Another thread that is really important to us and will definitely be included in our Enki Web activity is the importance of self-directed play and it's roll in self regulation, calming, and introspection.
i grew up an only child and really had very long periods of time where I played alone and quietly. Lost in my imagination and my thoughts. I really feel that this was a great gift in my life. Of course i wished I had siblings etc, every kid does, until they have them. LOL But really I think the extent of my creativity, thoughtfulness and ability to gain wisdom from my experiences and those of others comes directly from this aspect of my childhood. Of course there are other factors, but this is one I CAN bring to my children. Their alone time is far more limited due to siblings, but I really want to mindfully create opportunities for them to just free play, explore and imagine.
I remember being a little girl and playing with my Barbies. I didn't just do their hair and make them talk about their clothes. This was elaborate imaginative play that I can STILL remember storylines from. I would make entire "movies" as I called them, some would last for a month or so, and others just an afternoon. I had to build the sets, create the characters, choose their voices and styles. It would often take days just to get set up for the actual play part. The blessing here is that my Mother would allow for me to keep these huge "sets" set up in my room, so I could build and build and explore something through to the end, allowing the river to run its full course.
In looking back at this type of play I can see how it helped me to really explore the limits of my own mind and to really create an inner dialog that would carry me through many of life's curves and bumps. I want to give this opportunity to my kids.
So how?
Well currently and for as long as I have had the children, we have allowed a great deal of free play, supplying the open ended toys that allow them to get lost in their little worlds and to not feel that they had a time limit on it. It has been regarded as part of their job, and respected as an essential part of their childhoods. However I can see how having the boys sharing a room can really break up their individual styles and sets them up to really not have their own inner dialog develop. They are playing together and bending and communicating with one another throughout. This is terrific in its own right, but not the goal for this particular thread. (It fits into another)
We are renovating the house and while the boys will likely still want to sleep together, they will have their own rooms and their own spaces to build, explore and play while flowing with their individual stream of consciousness. I know they have very different styles and appreciate their ability to meet in the middle, however they aren't fully exploring themselves with this right now. I really hope having their own space will help with this.
Also we will continue to allow for the time to play in this way to exist. Giving them a free day each week to really just get lost in themselves, as well as the quiet time each day to play in their rooms uninterrupted and open ended.
This gives us three lesson days a week, plus the one day of coop. Together we will have four days of "learning" in a format that is conventional, and then we will have this free day, likely it will be Friday. There is still practice on this day, but the mornings are free.
Right now most of our days are open ended like this, because we are on a break, but I want to be sure to include it into our week, and to recognize it as a priority in our plans and expectations for each week.